I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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