it wasn't lemon gatorade
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.