Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize