oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
i need some magic done to my vagina
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
