so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Randomize
