There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
