we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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