Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
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