I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
She even gives head with a lisp.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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