We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Randomize
