God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
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