ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
