I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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