I murdered the dance floor call the cops
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
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