Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
