Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
Randomize
