She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
