i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
We just shotgunned beers for America
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
