She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
