Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
How does one acquire holy water?
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
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