Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I'm at about main and main street
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
