How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Randomize
