they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Randomize