Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize
