as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
