Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Randomize
