dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize
