it wasn't lemon gatorade
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
