Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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