In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
