Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
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