The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Randomize
