we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
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