Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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