yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
