So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
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he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
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