just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Randomize