3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I just googled if crying burns calories
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Randomize