I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
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I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
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LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
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