Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
