Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
porn star boner night. come get it.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
my poor anus
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Randomize
