And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize