just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize