Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Help. Why am I so naked?
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