So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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