..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
