sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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