Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
where are you?
Hypothermia
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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