i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
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Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
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I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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