There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
my poor anus
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
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