Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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