everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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